Cyber Bullying - Bet You Can't Say it to My FACE!!!

There have been countless times where I have gone on Youtube to watch a video and I’ll scroll down to see what others have thought about the video. As I am looking at the comments I almost ALWAYS encounter some type of hate. Why is it that people sitting behind a screen feel it is ok to say whatever they want to someone else, even when it is less than kind? What satisfaction do they receive from inflicting hurt onto others? I was instilled with the value that If what I have to say is not nice then I should not say anything, that value does not go out the window when I am sitting behind a computer screen. Even when giving feedback to others, you have to do it with kind words, individuals receiving the feedback are more likely to be more receptive. Keep your negative comments to yourself, they are not helping anyone and you just look like a dum-dum.  

When you are watching a video on Youtube … guess what? You can exit out of that video if you are not enjoying it. There is no law that says you NEED to leave a hateful comment or a comment at all. If you have beneficial feedback, then by all means leave a comment, however if you have nothing better to do than to hate on others go figure out what YOUR issues is. The hater has the comfort of hiding behind the computer screen, but there has to be some deeper meaning behind why the hater feels compelled to hate on someone else … Why are you spending so much energy on a negative comment? One should try to spread positivity. On top of that, more often than not, the person leaving a hate comment has nothing to offer. Being negative does not help anyone, if anything it just puts everyone in a bad mood. The internet allows people to hide behind a mask so that they do not have to confront their issues head on. They can do and say whatever they want without having to deal with the consequences of their actions. When you break things down, the hater or hate in general, is not a part of the solution, hate is not constructive at all. Edith did a post on being apart of the solution and not the problem, if you have not read it yet please check it out here.

Recently I was watching a music video that a local artist put up and someone went so far as to calling this person, “an idiot.” The artist has the right to express himself however he wants, and I am sure he was not even bothered by the comment … But me? As a third person looking in, I was completely disgusted. What makes this person feel it is ok to say these words to someone? I cannot tolerate when someone throws kindness out of the window and I often think to myself, would they have the nerve to say it to the person’s face? So I decided to go see what the name caller had to offer the world … and wouldn't you know it? This person did not even have a single video up … so what gives them the right to call another person, who is following their passion, an Idiot!?! If the hater has a problem .. then move on … watch another video … YOU DON’T HAVE TO LEAVE A COMMENT … what a concept. :O

When it comes to hate, I do not understand why it exists because we are ALL HUMAN!!!!! We all get cut the same way, and we all bleed the same way! Granted some of us have developed “thick skin” over time, when someone says hate has never affected them they are lying! At one point or another hate has gotten to us, but we have all survived. As a result we all know how sh*ty it can feel when hateful words are used against us, (check out my post on words.) so why is it that some want others to feel just as bad as they did? If you can honestly say you have never experienced hate to the same magnitude, then just think how you would feel if you were in the other person’s shoes? And if you cannot imagine it, then talk to the person, find out how they felt.

If you feel that you absolutely HAVE to say something, then learn how to give feedback! Learning how to give feedback can be used in all aspects of your life, not just on the internet. The first step is trying to figure out exactly “what” it is you are offering your two cents on. Then second and most important is to make sure that the other person is ready and willing to receive feedback. Once that is established move to action, in the last step seek agreement, work toward common grounds or make suggestions. Giving your feedback does not always have to be mean and hateful, there are other positive ways that you can convey your message. Giving feedback using the tips that I have laid out shows the other person that you actually care about their well being and want to see them succeed, which makes them more receptive to your opinion.

So leave hate on the other side of the door …in fact chuck that sh*t in the dumpster! … Where it belongs!

~Love not hate.

KARMA: Just Sit Back & Watch

“What goes around, comes around,” but what does that really mean? We hear people talking about Karma all the time, this is a more simple definition. When looking at the origins of Karma we must look at Indian Philosophy. Karma differs a little in each one of the eastern religions, but the word itself means “action,” or “deed.” Your actions now determine what will happen to you in the future. Karma gets more complex when you start talking about rebirth, because the concept of time is not linear as we know it in the western world. The basic idea is enough for our purposes.

With a little background out of the way, I am here to say that when someone does bad to you take the high road, do nothing. Whenever someone makes me upset because of their actions, I can choose to get mad and seek revenge, or I can think nothing of it and move on because I believe that one day they will get what is coming to them. Yes I have a story, of some instant Karma, are you ready? Well back in highschool there was a vicious rumor going around that I was a bit of a bully :O … I know right? But there was a staff member that thought he was going to do something about it, so he kept me after everyone else. I was not scared, I just wanted to see what was going to happen next. So he and I began to walk down a long flight of stairs, and he said to me, “I heard that you are a bully?” and my response was, “Really?” Then he said, “what are you going to do if I do this?” as he gave me a small push, and at the exact same point in time he almost fell down the stairs. I looked at him, and said, “absolutely nothing” as I gave him a smile. The story does not end there. He then asked me one more time what I was going to do if he pushed me yet again, and once again, he almost fell down the stairs. This time I said nothing and let him do it a third time, and yes you guessed it he almost fell again. After the third time, he looked at my face and said, “why?” My response? you might ask, it was simply, “Because, I believe in Karma.” needless to say, this guy NEVER messed with me again. This is a perfect example of where I could have gotten mad and all defensive but I chose not to because in the end he was going to get what was coming to him even if I did nothing.

Another great example of karma can be seen in  … are you ready for it? …  “Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets!” If you have not seen the movie or read the books, shame on you! .. haha just kidding. If you know what I am talking about, you get EXTRA brownie points (***To cash in your points leave a comment below ;-)***) and if not here is a little summary just for you! One of the Professors at the school, Gilderoy Lockhart, is a famous author that has written many books about his extraordinary adventures. Later on in the story we find out that Lockhart is a fake, he used a spell to make the other wizards lose their memories so that they couldn’t tell his secrets. His bad karma decided to kick in toward the end of the story, when he uses a broken wand to wipe Harry and Ron’s memory, but it backfires and wipes his own. KARMA!!!

My point is you do not always have to be the one to seek revenge, the universe, or greater power (whatever you believe) will figure it out in the end. If someone does something wrong to you just learn from it and move on, you do not need to put your mind through any unnecessary stress. (I did a post on forgiveness, check it out  here.) Just think good and do good, and you will get just that in return. It is not about what people think of you, what it IS however, the way you feel about you. If you put a positive energy out, you will get a positive energy in return.

~Ta Ta