There have been countless times where I have gone on Youtube to watch a video and I’ll scroll down to see what others have thought about the video. As I am looking at the comments I almost ALWAYS encounter some type of hate. Why is it that people sitting behind a screen feel it is ok to say whatever they want to someone else, even when it is less than kind? What satisfaction do they receive from inflicting hurt onto others? I was instilled with the value that If what I have to say is not nice then I should not say anything, that value does not go out the window when I am sitting behind a computer screen. Even when giving feedback to others, you have to do it with kind words, individuals receiving the feedback are more likely to be more receptive. Keep your negative comments to yourself, they are not helping anyone and you just look like a dum-dum.
Recently I was watching a music video that a local artist put up and someone went so far as to calling this person, “an idiot.” The artist has the right to express himself however he wants, and I am sure he was not even bothered by the comment … But me? As a third person looking in, I was completely disgusted. What makes this person feel it is ok to say these words to someone? I cannot tolerate when someone throws kindness out of the window and I often think to myself, would they have the nerve to say it to the person’s face? So I decided to go see what the name caller had to offer the world … and wouldn't you know it? This person did not even have a single video up … so what gives them the right to call another person, who is following their passion, an Idiot!?! If the hater has a problem .. then move on … watch another video … YOU DON’T HAVE TO LEAVE A COMMENT … what a concept. :O
When it comes to hate, I do not understand why it exists because we are ALL HUMAN!!!!! We all get cut the same way, and we all bleed the same way! Granted some of us have developed “thick skin” over time, when someone says hate has never affected them they are lying! At one point or another hate has gotten to us, but we have all survived. As a result we all know how sh*ty it can feel when hateful words are used against us, (check out my post on words.) so why is it that some want others to feel just as bad as they did? If you can honestly say you have never experienced hate to the same magnitude, then just think how you would feel if you were in the other person’s shoes? And if you cannot imagine it, then talk to the person, find out how they felt.
If you feel that you absolutely HAVE to say something, then learn how to give feedback! Learning how to give feedback can be used in all aspects of your life, not just on the internet. The first step is trying to figure out exactly “what” it is you are offering your two cents on. Then second and most important is to make sure that the other person is ready and willing to receive feedback. Once that is established move to action, in the last step seek agreement, work toward common grounds or make suggestions. Giving your feedback does not always have to be mean and hateful, there are other positive ways that you can convey your message. Giving feedback using the tips that I have laid out shows the other person that you actually care about their well being and want to see them succeed, which makes them more receptive to your opinion.
So leave hate on the other side of the door …in fact chuck that sh*t in the dumpster! … Where it belongs!
~Love not hate.
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