What Good Am I If I Do Not Help?

What is the value of one's life if they cannot see beyond their own pathetic little lives. Our lives are so small and insignificant that we do not have the option of being self centered. People who do not touch the lives of others are forgotten because they are too busy thinking about themselves. Had Martin Luther King Jr. only thought about himself, we would still be living in segregation. Had Mahatma Gandhi not stood up against injustices, we would still be fighting our oppressors with sticks and ammunition. Had Cesar Chavez not spoken out for workers’ rights, we would still be working for dirt. Had Sophia Auld not taken the time and risked her reputation to teach Frederick Douglass how to read, we would not have a narrative of a slave in American history. Where would we be without all of these amazing people? We could be here all day... year... if I continue to name more. One thing these people have in common is that they all were looking beyond their own lives and worked to make life better for everyone around them. King knew the dangers of what he was doing, but he stuck with it because he knew he could make a difference in the world. Gandhi knew how powerful the British were and he could have easily moved to another country, but he stood his ground and fought. Chavez knew that it was going to be a long and hard road to gaining basic human rights for farm workers, but he stuck with it and fought to the end. Auld knew that no one would approve of her affection for a slave, but she taught Douglas how to read and write anyway.

Human kindness. What does it mean? It means helping whomever, whenever you can. I am at a point in my life where I am trying to figure out what I can do to make it a fulfilling one, and I know that in order to make it a fulfilling one I need to help people. If I knew that I could do something to make someone else’s life better and I chose not to take action to help, I would constantly be wondering if I could have made a difference. Whenever I witness someone turning a blind eye when I know they are fully capable of helping someone, I feel disgusted in humanity. What is our purpose if we are not here to help those who are in need? Yes, it is true that we need to help ourselves before we can help others, but where does it end and where does it begin? Together we are much stronger than we will ever be alone. It takes a village to raise a child and we need to apply the same mentality when it comes to helping those around us.

Do something nice for someone. It doesn’t cost you an arm and a leg to make someone else's day. The main idea behind being truly kind to someone is to better their day without expecting a reward. Acts of true kindness build your character, it shows that you want to do something out of the honesty of your own heart and nothing more. Do what you can to help; if there is a sink full of dishes, wash them, if there is a person about to cross the street wait for for them, if there is a person asking for help, help them however you can. If anyone is in need of a little help, you could be the difference in their lives. Don’t worry about what they do with it, if you know you did what you could then you did your part, and you will know it wasn’t for lack of human kindness.

Not too long ago I was on my way to buy myself a mop, (cuz lord knows I needed it!) and I came across a little old lady who dropped her canned goods out of her shopping bag. We were walking in 95 degree weather and it was extremely windy, as a result she was having trouble controlling her shopping cart. I saw her struggling so naturally, I stopped to help her For me helping her was a no brainer. I was on a time crunch I need to get my mop and go, but I knew that if I helped her it would only take up 2 minutes of my time, and she too would be on her way much quicker. Once I was done helping her she looked at me and simply said, “Thank you, you just made my day.” Her 7 little words at the end made my day as well. When I stopped to help her I did not stop to seek some type of reward, but it was satisfying that my presence and helping hand was enough to turn someone’s day around. I then began to think what good am I if I cannot help the people around me? What kind of person would I be if I turned my back on another being in need?

~Do what you can no matter who is watching. Every little bit counts.

If I Knew Then What I Know Now: A Letter to Edith's Past Self

Dear,

You... Me... Us …

I know you think you don’t have your life together. News flash kiddo, at 25 you will still be trying to piece it together! Ten years into your future you will have learned a lot, but I want to use the opportunity to share some important life lessons that if applied sooner will come in handy.

Not knowing everything is not a bad thing. Life is about making mistakes and figuring out how to cope. Whenever you have doubt, you should ask questions even if you think you sound  stupid. Chances are that a lot of people around you feel the same way and have the same questions. When you choose to keep quiet, you deprive yourself from learning something new and sharing the knowledge with those around you.

You are young and smart, you shouldn’t be wasting your time on pointless things. You have so much to look forward to... you have no idea. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you can’t make decisions for yourself. That guy that made you feel like you were HIS property, is still an asshole. But who cares about his A$$!? I know you were afraid to lose him, but guess what? There are plenty of people in your life to love and who will love you back. These people will support you and help you become more independent. When you realize that your life is in YOUR hands, you can make decisions for yourself to create your own path. Don’t waste time with bittersweet people, you won’t get that time back. You have much learning to do and no time fo’ mahfuck@s. It is worth your while to spend time thinking about more important things such as school and your artistic and spiritual development; focus on these aspects of your life and you will continue to add more meaning to it.

You don’t realize it now but when you place your self-worth in the hands of someone who doesn’t appreciate and love you for who you are, it really wounds your self esteem. Don’t worry about what others will think, you don’t owe them anything. Just remember that you have to love yourself for who you are and don’t be ashamed of what you need and what makes you happy. It’s not up to anyone to determine what happiness is for you. Happiness is relative to each person. If you take care of yourself and work to keep YOU happy, you’ll be much more grateful and at peace with yourself. Don’t create an inner war with yourself to the point of no return, learn to cope with your surroundings. Afterall life is a game of push and pull. There will always be things to learn and unlearn. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Dream BIG. Dreams don’t cost you anything. You don’t have a lot of people who expect much of you other than your teachers and your parents. YOUR life is about YOU. You have the opportunity to dream big and work hard towards making those dreams come true. It’s ok if right now you don’t have the funds to travel, you don’t need it. Get lost in a new culture, visit a temple you’ve never been to before, eat food from another origin, follow the sunset until the edge of the world. Write down a list of places you want to go to and things you want to accomplish. It is especially important to write things down so that you can visualize what you want to do and you can work towards that goal. Once you’ve seen those goals through, crossing them off your bucket-list will feel satisfying! You will have the feeling of accomplishment and will want to work towards more goals and challenge yourself along the way!

Yo, get your isht together. You have a whole life ahead of you, don’t let the moment pass you by and live!

Much love and best wishes,

Edith P.

If I Knew Then What I Know Now: A Letter to Hareena’s Past Self

Dear, Me (5 years younger)

There are SO many things I could tell you about your future and how things turn out, but everything happens as it should. When things do not go as planned it is critical to learn how to pick yourself back up and learn to go with the flow. No matter what I tell you, from the future, it will not change the events of your life that will lead you to where I am today. You will have smoother transitions in life if you realize the changes that need to be made sooner.

Family, they will always be there, but they are not the ones living your life. Your family will support you in whatever it is that you want to do and your actions will affect them. However, your happiness is most important. You have to live with yourself and if you are not happy about what you have decided, then it is YOU that has to face yourself in the mirror everyday. So, listen to everyone, take their advice, but in the end do what you want to do. Listen to what your heart and mind are saying to you, it will make the difference and you will be more at peace with yourself.

Do not be afraid of change. There will be a point where you will have to leave everything behind; your childhood, your friends, your neighborhood. You will have to learn how to adjust to the change and you will have to learn how to figure things out for yourself. Learn how to break away from the comfort of your normal everyday life, learn to welcome the change and look at it as a new beginning, a new opportunity to learn.  

Figure out what you want to do and DO IT! The sky's the limit and do not let ANYONE tell you, “you can’t.” If you waste your time listening to people who tell you this, you will begin to believe it. You will be stuck with nowhere to go and stray away from your purpose. Essentially, you will be wasting your valuable time. The feeling of being lost will overcome you causing you to lose purpose. The only way you will figure out what you want to do is to try new things! Do not stop yourself from trying new things, that next thing you try, just may be what you were meant to do. Do not settle for less than what you deserve.

A part of living is dying. People will come and go, but it's especially hard to lose someone that is close to you. It is even harder to lose someone that you NEVER got a chance to know. Never miss out on the opportunity to speak to anyone, no matter how close or distant the relationship is. You never know when your conversation will be the last one.

This next piece of advice that I am about to share with you may sound a bit odd, given our history, but try to care less. There will be people that come into your life that you will care too much about, and it will seem as though they do not even care whether or not you are even breathing regularly. Be kind to everyone, and do not show any one any negative feelings.There will be those few people that will be there for you when you need them and those are the people you need to care for. Put the effort in showing them that you care. A Mark Twain quote comes to mind, “Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.” So, if you care less about the people that do not blink an eye for you, you will have more time to focus on yourself and the people who deserve your attention, you will endure less suffering.

Sincerly,

Hareena (from the future)