Our Paths Crossing Was No Mistake

The other night I dreamt I was having a good time catching up with a friend of mine from elementary school when suddenly I woke up. I haven’t spoken to her in years, but this dream sent me down memory lane. I began to remember moments during my childhood. I realized that it reminded me how long it’s been since I’ve seen or contacted her. It also helped me see how the relationship we had has transformed over time and how we changed as individuals. We become so busy, sometimes we don’t stop to realize how we are changing. Change takes a while and happens slowly that the currents in our lives have a way of washing away that notion of change.

Given that everyone comes from different walks of life, everyone’s experience is different and therefore their changes are unique to their experiences. We each take our own paths and those paths cross someone else’s, like Flavia Weedn says “Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.” Let’s face it, Flavia has a point, people make changes in the lives of others, hopefully they are good ones, check out Hareena's post on  how we can make a difference in peoples lives.

Needless to say these changes don’t stand in the way of continuing a relationship with the people of your past. However, in some cases, the changes in either party or both are so drastic, even the attempt at a rendezvous is in vain. They say time heals all wounds, but time can also create a void that if it goes unfilled will drift both people away to the point of no return.

I have to remember that I am surrounded by people that love me and care about me NOW, and not make too much of the past. Memories only serve to remind us how we got here and can help us learn life lessons, but let’s not reminisce for too long for there is more to uncover on your path. Move it along beautiful people make your life happen.

Love always,

-Edith

Someone Needs to Hear YOU!

When I was younger, no one ever took the time to listen to me. Naturally, I did not place value on myself. I did not feel that what I had to say was important enough to say it, but as time went on I learned how to break out of my shell and I found my voice. I have also learned that one should use their voice to leave a positive mark on the world. As Maya Angelou said, “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

The first time I remember making a difference in someone’s life was when I was in middle school, and it was actually one of my teachers! At the time I did not realize how this moment would impact the rest of his life. This teacher was in his first year of teaching, and we were a difficult group of kids to work with, and that’s putting it lightly. We used to throw paper across the room and never did the work that was assigned to us. One day after class my teacher was walking around the room picking up all of the trash the students had thrown every which way. I stopped him and asked why he was picking up everyone’s trash and why he did not make everyone else pitch in to clean it up. He proceeded to tell me that we (students) were all “fools” and we cannot even do a simple task such as clean up. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like being called a fool. So my response to him was, “We are only fools, because teachers like you do not teach us.” After I said those potentially damaging words to my teacher, I left the room.

I did not understand the gravity of my words, I was just being a “sassy” preteen. The next day the teacher came to me before class, and said, “Hareena, you were right,” and from that day forward the class was run very differently. But all that aside, my teacher, someone I am supposed to look up to as a role model, was telling me that I was right. At the time I still did not understand the weight my words brought to this educator, but all these years later I am aware of how I made a difference. I made him rethink his job, his livelihood.

Many years later I have come to learn that I have a voice, I maybe the youngest in my family, but I too have value, I CAN make a difference. When I became a student at UC Berkeley, I kind of “stumbled” into the Leadership Institute. By the time I got to UC Berkeley, I became the stereotypical quiet Indian girl in the corner of the classroom, but through my leadership experience I found my voice. This new voice was not the same voice of the “sassy” preteen, this voice had a little more understanding, but it still lacked value. I always like to hear what others have to say before I speak up, but I still felt that what I had to say was not helpful. By the time I graduated, I realized that if I do not place value on what I have to say then no one else will either.

When I moved back home after college it was hard. I felt that I was losing that voice that I was so proud of. I am always going to be the youngest in my family, and my voice is always going to be belittled, only because I am still seen as the little girl I was many years ago. This was a test for my voice. I realized that I have the right to express my opinions and if no one is listening to ME that is THEIR loss. Writing blog posts for you all is another way I keep my voice, and I wanna hear your voice … down below!!! You know the DRILL!!!

The main take away is this, TALK!!! You do not know what kind of impression you will leave on someone else, so make it a positive one! Back in the Valentine's day post we wrote about a TED talk by Drew Dudley, on leadership. Dudley talks about how we as people are leaders without even knowing it, and we need to let the people around us know that they have made a positive impact on our lives. Dudley calls this point in time the “Lollipop moment,” this is the exact moment in time when the other person made the impact. My teacher back in middle school had this “Lollipop moment” with me. I encourage you … no, no, I challenge you to give someone a “Lollipop moment” within the next week! Good luck and let me know how It goes.

~The Voice be with you, Always!