Showing posts with label Grudges. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grudges. Show all posts

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Family Holidays


The holidays are just around the corner! Did you make sure to get the turkey? How many are we serving? Will there be enough? What about the presents?! The holidays are just another great way to stress about everything, HOORAY! .. No, let’s remember what the holidays are about, the importance of having your family and loved ones together to enjoy each others company and to catch up. We already spend so much time busy with work and dealing with our own lives that we forget who matters the most, our loved ones. Take the time to celebrate and focus on the good things, and be grateful for the people around you that you love and care about. Realize that the holidays are about appreciating what you have now.


This is the time of the year to let go of pointless grudges, all the pent up emotions will not make for healthy vibes to add to the holiday cheer. Use this opportunity to start smoothing out those rough edges and tying up loose ends. There’s nothing in the world that can’t be ‘fixed’ and it’s better to settle things for the sake of common peace and well being. Grudges are pointless, they lead you to open up a bottle of old negative emotions that can ruin a perfectly good family reunion. Not to mention, they take a toll on your personal peace and well being. Don’t let past issues mess up your’s and your loved ones chance to catch up. Grudges don’t solve a thing, instead focus on creating good memories with the people you love so you have something good to look back on. When you are dealing with hard times, these are the memories you want to come back to, not the grudges.

I think it’s sad when people let greed reign during the holidays. I have been taught that it’s better to give than to receive. I’m not saying it’s not okay to treat yourself or feel excited to receive a present from someone, but that’s not what the festivities are about. The holidays are about giving. Unfortunately, I know people who give to receive and they expect to get some ridiculously expensive gifts in return. If this is the only way for them to feel happy during these holidays then they’ve completely missed the point. When you receive a gift, it’s the thought that counts and not the money spent on the gift. Do not expect to receive gifts, when you do it’ll be a nice surprise. Let gratitude reign over greed!


Materialistic things are not as important as your loved ones so dont waste your time on objects, they won’t be able to give you love and support. Celebrate eachothers presence, it’s not about the gifts! During these holidays appreciate your loved ones and look forward to more joyful moments with them in future gatherings. The experiences you build with your loved ones are priceless. Appreciate each other to the fullest while you still can. Don’t let these family gatherings get SO spaced out allowing the tumbleweed to roll in between. Treasure everyone while you can because if you wait until next year to see them, who knows if the same ones will come back for the next holiday. Be grateful of the folks that are in your life, because there will be a time when they will no longer be there.

Life is like a box of chocolates, it’s gonna melt! In all seriousness, after reading this post, go give your folks a call and tell them just how much you love and appreciate them, this will make them feel so loved :) Don’t be a stranger now!


Happy Family Time!

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Forgive but NEVER Forget





A few years back I was having a conversation with a friend about the popular phrase “forgive and forget.” She was telling me that she never forgives nor forgets, and I was arguing that you should forgive, but do not forget. I think that no matter the situation, if it is big or small, forgive. My reasoning is a purely selfish one, forgive for your own peace of mind. When it comes to forgetting, don’t, file the incident in the back of your mind.


At the end of the day what really matters is how you feel about yourself. So, if you are busy being mad at someone else, how do you think that will affect your well being? Life is short so why waste your precious time being upset at someone else, just forgive them and move on. Buddha once said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” By not forgiving someone else you are holding on to something that will only hurt you in the end, if you do not get hurt physically it may be mentally. As for the other person, all you can do is hope they have learned their lesson, you cannot control how how other people think.

Never forget. If this person has wronged you, you do not want to make this mistake 2 times, by allowing them to hurt you. Some will say that you are not truly over an incident until you have forgotten, but I am here to say is not true. Going back to my post on Trust , I say that because this person betrayed me I now know that I cannot trust them in the same way again. I have made peace with what happened, it is no longer bothering me, it’s water under the bridge as they say. However If I forget that this person betrayed my trust, it will only happen again. When someone does something that causes you to rethink your relationship with them, it is hard to bounce back and act as though nothing has happened. With that being said, people do change and learn from their mistakes, it is not right to hold something against someone that happened along time ago. With time comes experience, and as we all get older we learn from our mistakes. Give the other person the benefit of the doubt, because you cannot truly forgive someone unless you can move past the situation.

Another thing that people do not do often enough is forgive themselves. The fact of the matter is that you cannot change the past. Life is SHORT! (Check out my other post in Dying) If you cannot change what happened, deal with it,learn from it and move on. If you need to say you're sorry say it and go back to living your life. You cannot put things on hold, time does not stand still for anyone. Do you want to spend your life holding a grudge? I have never met a single person on this planet who did not want to be happy, so get over it and be happy … and yes it IS that simple. We are only as happy as we allow ourselves to be. SOOOO forgive the asshole (even if that asshole happens to be YOU) and move on!

~Live, Learn. Move on.